That's one of the first things that came to mind when I woke up this morning. Most people probably woke up thinking, "Oh yeah, today is Easter!" But not me. "500 what?" you're probably wondering. 500 days of recovery - recovery from an eating disorder.
Most of you who know me also know that I had been diagnosed with an eating disorder in December 2015 and have been recovering, but I don't really talk about it. I have thought long and hard about addressing this, but I feel like it's something that needs to be shared. I know there are people out there recovering who choose not to share their story, and that's fine, but it's different for me. I've often wondered why this happened, why I'm dealing with this, and I still don't know. I may not ever know. But maybe, just maybe, this is one of the reasons. To raise awareness. To educate people about them. Because, unfortunately, it is an illness that is not talked about enough. Too many people do not understand. They are uneducated about it, and misinformed. That's not their fault. It's just something that's not discussed openly.
No one knows EXACTLY what causes eating disorders. I don't know, and I've gone through one! There are many factors - genetics, society, etc.; and everyone's case is different. One thing that I've learned - there is no blueprint for an eating disorder. Each person's experience is different.
I would love to be able to tell you that I'm recovered, but I'm not. I'm recovering. There's a difference, trust me. I have good days, and I have bad days. There are some days when I make progress, and some days when I'm tempted to not eat enough. I wish I could just flip a switch and everything would be okay, but it's not that easy. Recovery is not a matter of months; it can take several years. Recovery is HARD WORK. It is the hardest thing I've ever experienced, and I'm told, will probably ever experience. But I'm also told it's worth it. All the pain, sweat, and tears - it's worth it once you get to the finish line. I still have a ways to go. Sure, I've made leaps and bounds, but I am still healing. Physically, I am MUCH better, but I'm not 100%. Surprisingly, my body is still having to repair itself. I am also better mentally, but I definitely have to work on regaining a healthy mindset about food and making sure I don't restrict.
If you're curious about my recovery experience, you can ask me how I'm doing; I won't act embarrassed or offended. I'll be truthful; I may not always open up as much as I could, but I will tell you the truth.
If you're reading this, and you (or someone you know) is struggling with an eating disorder, PLEASE seek medical treatment. Believe me when I tell you that it is a serious, potentially life-threatening illness that can do destructive things to your body if left untreated. It's not something to be taken lightly. Also, rely on faith, family, and friends for strength and support. It's not always easy (it's sometimes impossible!) to explain exactly how you're feeling or what you're going through, but I'm sure there has to be at least one person you know who will listen to you and help you.
I promise, this blog won't be just about recovery; I'll cover other areas of my life as well. But I felt this was something that needed to be covered too. I hope everyone had a good Easter, and has a great week (:
If you're curious about my recovery experience, you can ask me how I'm doing; I won't act embarrassed or offended. I'll be truthful; I may not always open up as much as I could, but I will tell you the truth.
If you're reading this, and you (or someone you know) is struggling with an eating disorder, PLEASE seek medical treatment. Believe me when I tell you that it is a serious, potentially life-threatening illness that can do destructive things to your body if left untreated. It's not something to be taken lightly. Also, rely on faith, family, and friends for strength and support. It's not always easy (it's sometimes impossible!) to explain exactly how you're feeling or what you're going through, but I'm sure there has to be at least one person you know who will listen to you and help you.
I promise, this blog won't be just about recovery; I'll cover other areas of my life as well. But I felt this was something that needed to be covered too. I hope everyone had a good Easter, and has a great week (:
